OK – well it’s been a while between posts and that’s because I haven’t really had much to say. The anti vertigo medication really messed with my head and made me feel worse so after a few days I took myself off it, I have been having regular osteo sessions and have been a good girl and laying off the exercise and I’m now at a point where my lightheadedness is gone and I’m allowed back out in the big wide world of exercise.
So a month off training and a week away from my 10km fun run does not give me much time to get myself ready. Wednesday morning I headed out on my first run since my illness, I was aiming for 4km but made it only 3 before I needed to walk, I was really disappointed as I have never had to walk before while out on a run, decided that the next run I would tackle in the afternoon sunshine as I wondered if the cold air of 5.30 in the morning hindered my efforts. So last night after work I headed off to the river aiming for 5km, this time I made it to 4.3km before I needed to walk. I have started letting the doubt sneak in, a month ago I was positive I was going to kill this 10km, now with my disappointment of my last 2 runs I think I am not going to make it. Thankfully I have 2 men backing me all the way, my husband keeps me positive, keeps telling me I HAVE got it in me and I CAN do it and to keep myself positive, god I love that man, he has put up with so much from me with all this shit going on the last month but he still has my back and is still encouraging me every step of the way, he unfortunately can no longer run with me due to knee problems & that is where my other encouragement comes from, Greg, I met Greg through one of my very good friends, he is her husband, Julie is responsible for getting me involved in 12WBT and I thank her every day for showing me the way to changing my life for the better, although Greg has spent the last 3 weekends cycling 200kms in rides to conquer cancer and he hasn’t run for a long time due to focusing on his riding, he has agreed to step in and run the 10km with me. Every time I have doubted myself he has been there with encouragement for me and even though I have warned him how super slow I go he will be there with me every step of the way to push me along. I also have a group of wonderful women in my life that are teaching me to not be so hard on myself (you know who you are). I am very lucky to have such wonderful people in my life. I WILL get to the end of the 10km on Sunday, I may have to walk a portion of it and it has taken me a really long time to accept that even if I don’t run the entire 10km nonstop, it is OK. I will just go out there and do the best that I can do!
|A few words to remember|