Good friends – Glad I’ve got em

OK – well it’s been a while between posts and that’s because I haven’t really had much to say. The anti vertigo medication really messed with my head and made me feel worse so after a few days I took myself off it, I have been having regular osteo sessions and have been a good girl and laying off the exercise and I’m now at a point where my lightheadedness is gone and I’m allowed back out in the big wide world of exercise.

So a month off training and a week away from my 10km fun run does not give me much time to get myself ready. Wednesday morning I headed out on my first run since my illness, I was aiming for 4km but made it only 3 before I needed to walk, I was really disappointed as I have never had to walk before while out on a run, decided that the next run I would tackle in the afternoon sunshine as I wondered if the cold air of 5.30 in the morning hindered my efforts. So last night after work I headed off to the river aiming for 5km, this time I made it to 4.3km before I needed to walk. I have started letting the doubt sneak in, a month ago I was positive I was going to kill this 10km, now with my disappointment of my last 2 runs I think I am not going to make it. Thankfully I have 2 men backing me all the way, my husband keeps me positive, keeps telling me I HAVE got it in me and I CAN do it and to keep myself positive, god I love that man, he has put up with so much from me with all this shit going on the last month but he still has my back and is still encouraging me every step of the way, he unfortunately can no longer run with me due to knee problems & that is where my other encouragement comes from, Greg, I met Greg through one of my very good friends, he is her husband, Julie is responsible for getting me involved in 12WBT and I thank her every day for showing me the way to changing my life for the better, although Greg has spent the last 3 weekends cycling 200kms in rides to conquer cancer and he hasn’t run for a long time due to focusing on his riding, he has agreed to step in and run the 10km with me. Every time I have doubted myself he has been there with encouragement for me and even though I have warned him how super slow I go he will be there with me every step of the way to push me along. I also have a group of wonderful women in my life that are teaching me to not be so hard on myself (you know who you are). I am very lucky to have such wonderful people in my life. I WILL get to the end of the 10km on Sunday, I may have to walk a portion of it and it has taken me a really long time to accept that even if I don’t run the entire 10km nonstop, it is OK. I will just go out there and do the best that I can do!

A few words to remember

Doctors Orders

OK so I have been told I have to lay off the exercise, if I am to do anything, all I’m allowed is a short walk…..how is that going to get me ready for my 10km run, closely followed by the 12km run??? But doctor (well Osteopath) orders it, so if I want to get better then I must obey. My lightheadedness is still with me, as are my occasional dizzy moments. I am constantly in conversation and lose track of what I was saying, I feel like a right idiot at times, plus I am constantly exhausted.

My appointment with the Osteo went really well last week and I really feel that it did something to help, I have a follow up next week and I need to continue on my medication until then so I just have everything crossed that things will start to improve soon. The sun has started shining more frequently and I just want to pull on my runners and head out for a run along the river.

My new form of exercise

I gave myself the day off yesterday, planned on hanging out on the couch just trying to have some recovery time but a call from daycare put a stop to that rather quickly and instead I spent 2 hours treating my daughter’s hair for head lice, stripping beds, getting loads of washing done, cleaning kitchen and cooking dinner. I did get some quality couch time in the evening once the girls had gone to bed so tonight I’ll tackle Washing Mountain and get some folding done while I sit and watch TV

So feeling very useless at the moment, longing to get out and move and hoping that whatever it is going on in my head right now will F off really soon

Missing Exercise

I can’t believe how different I am to the girl I was 1 year ago. Please excuse me if this post does not make sense. I have been suffering from constant lightheadedness for the past week and a half and it means I can’t concentrate well. It is because of this that it has also been 9 days since I last exercised! I am really struggling with this, I see someone out running and I get jealous! Exercise or running to me a year ago were dirty words now I am absolutely craving exercise and it is killing me that I can’t go out and join in. I saw a doctor on Wednesday who couldn’t find anything physically wrong with me, I had blood taken and I get the results from the blood tests this afternoon, I am really hoping they can shed some light on what is going on so I can get it fixed and get on with it. The 10km and 12km events I have coming up are not going to run themselves, I need to get out there and keep training for them. 

I wish - come on head, get better

If the blood tests don’t show anything I might go and see an Osteo and get them to check my body is all how it should be, maybe my mixing up of the training schedule last week has caused some sort of shift within me that my head is just not happy with? If anyone has any other ideas or has had similar issues with lightheadedness feel free to share, I just want to feel normal again. In the meantime I’ll try not to undo all my good work, I have been letting a few extra treats sneak in but so far the scales are stable. I have a dress on the way, my hotel & flights booked & today my ticket is being purchased for 12WBT finale party, just need to stay in control so the dress still fits me in a few weeks time. Fingers crossed for some answers this afternoon so I can get back out and pound that pavement, at the same time I know I must be patient and wait for my head to sort itself out, pushing myself with exercise may cause more damage, anyone that knows me knows that patience is not a key strength for me, this is going to be tough   

I must be patient and wait for answers